Do you have a friend who makes you feel uncomfortable with her remarks or jokes making you feel like she’s purposely putting you down in some way? It hurts doesn’t it? It hurts even more especially if you have that ‘friend’ in your inner circle.
I have been too busy since I can remember so I did not really have the time to think about this sensitive topic until recently.
I just came back from a beach vacation (thus, my blog photo) and I had quite a few hours to listen to my spirit and digest some of the things that it is telling me.
One of the things that struck me was the way this friend has been treating me for the past few months. I love this friend. I have her in my inner circle. We have known each other for quite a long time and we’re really close. But lately, I realized, she’s been dishing out some hurtful comments masked as jokes every time she gets the chance to do so.
…And she did it again recently. TT_TT
At first, I felt like I should come up with a strong answer against her exaggerated statements. I felt that I should tell her right there and then that I am feeling ridiculed and that she is getting way out of line.
But I waited…I took a deep breath and in true Jenny fashion, I let it go.
In fact, I sort of laughed along with her.
I contemplated on that episode during my vacation. I wanted that negative emotion to leave me because I love her.
So I prayed…I poured out my heart to God.
And last night, here is what He told me:
"Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse." Romans 12:14
After meditating on that verse, I suddenly remembered that my friend has flaws too. She may be jealous of me because of the good things that are coming my way recently. When I thought about that, I felt compassion for her. I suddenly had the heart to understand her even more.
My favorite preacher Joel Osteen said something about not having all our friends in the way we’re supposed to go. When we move forward, not all friends will understand us. In fact, some may even try to discourage us thinking that our choices may not be the best for us.
Painful as it may seem, some friends will really not understand how you are changing especially if the change is strongly from within.
I still love that friend but I realize now that there has to be some changes in our friendship in order for me to really grow.
Surrendering my life to the Lord is the best decision I have ever made in my life and if that friendship is making me doubt all the strides I have made since that day, I believe I have to choose what my spirit is telling me. I love her and I will always treat her as a close friend but I think it is time to loosen up the strings so I could fly a bit higher than before.
"The mark of a mature relationship is that you can relax if your friend is moving away. In all our relationships, we move together and apart." Pastor, author and counselor Alan Loy Mc Ginnis